There was an old woman who lived in a shoe, she had a hot date and didn't know what to do!
The closet was bare and so was her cubbard, her clothes looked outdated like old mother hubbard.
So in the spirit of Scarlet O'Hara, she whipped up a dress and even added mascara.
Little did one know the new addition to her closet, were the curtains that hung above her kitchen faucet.
Some say it's cheaper to dress like a harlot, but a lady she remained, inspired by Scarlet.

You've been invited to a mystery wedding!

You've been invited to a wedding full of mystery and doubt, the poor bride will soon find out the groom is a lout!

The bride dreamed of big dinners and picnics in the park, pleasing her husband and keeping that spark!

The groom had charm and a wicked sultry smile, he'd fooled everyone because of his style.

He thought she had money, why else would he bother, little did he know the butler was her father.

So at the alter they met with false expectations, the

exchanging of rings, both imitations.

They spoke their vows and were about to say "I do," when all of a sudden he was whacked with a shoe!

From the back of the church stood a girl, skin alabaster, "This wedding is off, this man's a disaster!"

The groom was already married and deeply in dept,
He thought with this new bride his life would be set.

The bride's withered mother, a woman challenged in grace clocked the groom right there and he landed on his face!

The bride stood in horror, then smiled at her mother, let's get started now and find me another!